Dear Sandra and Leslie:

I realized I was running the risk of being one who chose the bad wolf, but I didn't spend most of my life learning psychology for naught. I'm a licensed psychologist who has also taught psychology courses for therapists to be..

When working with families, psychotherapists recognize various styles of dealing with or not dealing with conflict. Interestingly, not dealing with conflict can cause as much, or possibly even more, problems for the children in the type of family that wishes to look good to others and sweeps all problems under the carpet. And, there are these "dark" ways to keep everyone convinced this is the way it should be.

When human beings fail to deal with issues, feelings, beliefs, behaviors, etc., the repressed energy begins to take negative forms. This is a fact! Anger seeps out in hidden ways, or targets the innocent, projections occur... Many holistic theorists and practitioners would support the belief that unresolved feelings and beliefs are also a core factor in any illness (cancer, etc.).

So insisting on healthy dialogue is a must... (even if it means being labeled in a negative light--it is important to articulate our truth and our caring).

Warmly, Sharon

--- On Tue, Oct 21, 2008, in msg265395, Sandra Beck wrote ---

Dear Sharon,

Thanks for these comments. I didn't see the movie of Sieriana, but I do understand the similarities.

Based on the emails I've seen offline, women in all three forums have gone silent, not because they suddenly support this kind of political process (most don't), and not because they don't care about SophiaWWC anymore (most do), but, because they're concerned and disappointed we still DON'T see anything changing or opening up here, even after weeks of steady and heartfelt input from MANY very wise women and advisors.

They've also gone silent because they're tired of being monitored, muzzled and labeled as "bad" for trying to continue a conversation about healing, new ideas and better ways. I've never seen a process that openly invited people to participate then abruptly shut them down, then used shame tactics if they didn't "go along." Many women watching are NOT "going along." They are going away.

Most women do not wish to be part of any Sieriana-type group that conspires to "kill one of it's own brothers or sisters", literally or figuratively, in order to have it's own way. Nor do we want to be a group that huddles around a small power circle, and doesn't notice or care that our sisters are gone. I DO care that my sisters are gone. I DO notice that more are leaving, and others are being discredited for the act of speaking up. I DO care that we learn from this, and move to a place where EVERY Sister is welcome (without exception) and NO ONE has to be blamed, shamed or labeled as "bad."

I think about leaving this group as well, and many ask why I bother. One reason is because I told a lot of people about this conference before I observed all these actions that have made me question what's really happening here. I haven' told my friends tand groups to "walk away" yet, but I HAVE told them to "wait and see" what happens within this leadership group and how they handle this situation.

Right now, SophiaWWC looks a lot like the Sieriana movie plot. But THIS story isn't quite over yet, and if we choose to, we can come together and write a much happier ending. I hope we will.

Sandra Beck

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--- On Mon, Oct 20, 2008, in msg265383, Sharon Mijares wrote ---

I was familiar with the NA story of the two wolves. It reminded me if of other choices, particularly some of the plot in the movie Sieriana. The story revealed much of the quest for oil and riches behind the big oil companies and our government. There were two brothers, princes in a rich Middle Eastern nation.

The one brother was fairly self-centered and the other one was open to new ideas. He held his meetings in a circle, he talked about elevating the position of women as equals.

The sad thing was that the players behind the scenes chose to have the open-minded brother killed as they wanted to other one in power as he could be manipulated.

At the end of the movie there was a scene with all the big oil guys, etc., hosting the ME prince ignoring the loss of the other one (perhaps not even aware of what had happened).

Like the metaphor of the two wolves this also has meaning. It's amazing how people will ignore history. My last book was co-authored with an Egyptian Muslim Sufi woman (anthropologist) and an Israeli Jewish woman. We talked about this theme of ignoring history and how much we need to learn from our mistakes of the past.

Most of all we need to understand and discuss what are the true features of the feminine? How do women resolve issues?

Wishing you all well and looking forward to ongoing discussions.

Warmly, Sharon

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